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She was late. I played the PSP. She then msg to meet her somewhere we don’t always meet.

I sneak to see. She was preparing something. I step in. She say sit down, and presented a cake. She sat down. But not just that. She sat with a guitar.

She strum a note. I know that song. Paramore, “The Only Exception” She strum. Beautifully. And I was shock, she sang too.

She was shaking. Trembling. But her voice. Was pure. Sincere. And as beautiful as her face.

I was shaking. I was touched. I got lost in her eyes. I couldnt control my smile. And tear.

The cake rad. Happy 2 years, with the date 010408 with it. And she wrote me a card. With old and new pictures. With so little lines but so many meaning in each of it.

With this, my 2 years ani. Will always be remembered. For life.

Thank you,

ps. I love you.

Sometimes, this lovely girl comes out with this

Janaa: US<3 says:
i love you. And i know your consatantly worried for me. Trust me, your the guy i want to spend my life with. yes i want it to be you. We’ll work everything out and not give you. We’ll have those time we can’t stand each other, but we still have to be strong and be there for each other. i love you and please take care of yourself.
your gf.

Yes, awww. Rite? =)

Ego, Shocks

To dear friends,

Passing out something and going through a new thing doesnt mean we’re moving on and dragging the old ones to the rubbish bin. I somehow think we’ve change. We keep doing it. Our topics are never compatible. Because we’re two different bunch of people. Two different thinking. Interest. Ways. But one thing is for sure, we never forget. We’re playful. Have always been. I think you know better right?

So I think. You’ve change. You weren’t like this. You swallow your ego more then eating it. So why the reverse now. We, are guys who I think not know too much on the “do’s and dont” when meeting up old friends. Yes we suck at it. But to judge us because of this, is wrong. And I think we got sucker punch again. I may be using my emotion then thinking writing all this, but If at the moment I am using it more, I say that means I’m angry. No. Wrong. I’m dissapointed. We’ve been through shit so much to let this effect us.

My last word. The world meaning to what I saw is, your giving up on us. Giving up on something you were able to hold on to for so long and poof. You give up. If that is correct, I won’t stop you. Ever heard the song which goes like “I’ll smile, You’ll wave. We’ll pretend, its ok.” Somehow this is beginning to be like that.

And for the other friend,

fuck. Its disturbing. Effing disturbing.

Thoughts

janaaaa: FML, i am a sucker at living my own life. says:

"i do try to give you what ever i can. i swear i do. I’m willing to do anything for you. And i know you know that too. i just dont know what else to say anymore. since i cant apologise or say its my fault. i’ll say this. i suck at living my own life. i suck at giving you the best. cause when i do try, i still suck anyways. i know everyone is not perfect. i’m not, i’m worst then that. i have attitude problem no one can get it, i have mood swings no one can take it. and one day i know you wont be able to take. i know. but i still do try. i’m was never good at explaining my emotion. i can never get it right and i always hurt you along the way. now im trying. i hope i dont hurt you. i want to give you the best. but at times i cant and i feel like im a loser. but i try."

serving as a purpose to remember

Goodbye 2009

What can I say about 2009? I figure out, I think this year went really smoothly.

A few words of success and failures.

Failures

One of the main failures I see myself is really money issues. I usually think money flows out and I don’t really know where it was channel to. And I figure out that the only way to solve it is to note down every single thing I spend. Including the cigerattes, the food, the kinder bueno’s and everything else even going to the 10 cents toilet. And that way I can somehow track down who’s the real culprit.

And I’ve not been too good to myself. Somehow or other I know he needs a treat too sometimes. But I tend to use everything on others and I just put on hold dreams of things.

Temper. Yes. Something I wish to control. Can’t help it. Probably got it from my mum. I wish to be a more patience person. Maybe one of the top 2010 Resolution.

Success

I think so far being in SAF was rather good for me. I got platoon best during BMT. I made it to OCS. And I got through service term with great friends. And somehow or other, I’ve been doing rather ok in SAF. Shockingly but true. Never a uniform group person, but to be doing ok, Im proud of it.

Love can never be perfect for a whole one year. If its too perfect its not really a healthy one. So I must say its been great too. Im somehow coping to help her in many ways and yes, sometimes it gets to crazy I forgot myself again. But nevertheless, Im glad I could help make her dreams come true. Well not all of it yet, probably above average? Well anyway, I know I love her. And Im still trying to cope with some of her attitude plus dealing with my own. Somehow, we’ll overcome it ok Jannah?

Time flows so fast. And I just remember I graduated from POLY this year. I almost forgot about that. Its a success too rite? But 2.48 for a GPA isnt that high of an achievement. But hey, I made it?

2009 final goodbyes. I wish probably some moment of it could be amend to a better way. I wish I could have spend those time in between on more productive things. But I’m glad 2009 was much of a better year. I cry less. I get sad less. I’m happy more. And I hope the following years, will just be the same.

Welcome. 2010.

Dear Jane

     When I’m in camp, I’ve always felt something amissed. Its like having a box of chocolate and its empty. Its like having a big mansion with no one inside. Its like a song with no meaning or sense into it. And myself know what I’m missing. You. I know I have not been the same Romeo I was you met one year ago. But I assure you, I’ve never stop loving you. And I still feel the same as a year ago. Love is like a free buffet full of kinder bueno. Its like lying down on a bed of candy floss. Its like lying on top of a mountain so high you can touch the stars. Love is like a guy who actually found you. Like I did. Your heart and sincerity, is pure. You may be weak in many possible ways, but your strong everytime you try to get back up again. And do remember, you have a great power to overun all obstacle ahead of you. And you know if you fall, I’ll drop with you and we get back up together while I grip your hand. So strive on. Succeed and excel in everything you do. And dont let the one revolving you distracts you. Final words. I love you. And I always felt something amissed, when I’m in camp.

With Love,

Seth.

181109, 1130am

Ps, I wrote this in lecture.

Three Cheers For 19months

Everyday I’ll try to give you more.

Everyday I’ll try to give you a much meaning to love.

Everyday I’ll make the world a bigger place for you.

Everyday I never love you less.

Everyday I make you feel so much you are that revolves my world.

Everyday I do the same, of what you are to me.

Ily. 010408 - To Present.

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